My First Mate says I spend way too much time writing about Chon’s Sonoran hot dogs, Playa Bonita margaritas and UA coeds in bikinis. She thinks this column would be much better received if I wrote about Peñasco’s more important offerings. So, here we go.
FIRST MATE: What is it about
ankle bracelets?
CAP’N GREG: Excuse me?
FIRST MATE: The more we women
have, the more we want.
CAP’N GREG: Let me see if I
understand. We’re talking about your dozens of ankle bracelets, yet you have
only two ankles. And you want more?
FIRST MATE: How many red
T-shirts are in your dresser drawer?
CAP’N GREG: Um, 10?
FIRST MATE: You have 31 in
there. I counted them this morning.
CAP’N GREG: Well…
FIRST MATE: How many captain
hats?
CAP’N GREG: Maybe three?
FIRST MATE: Oh, please. You
have one or your head 24/7, two on the hat rack and eight in the closet.
CAP’N GREG: I have to be
prepared.
FIRST MATE: For what? You re-joining
the Navy after 50 years?
CAP’N GREG: Let’s get back to
the ankle bracelets. Why so many?
FIRST MATE: They give me
pleasure. They look good. I have a design for every occasion. And vendors have
an ever-changing variety that I enjoy pawing through. Even if I don’t buy any,
it’s a fun outing for me and Marci.
CAP’N GREG: Is that all?
FIRST MATE: While
we are out shopping, you and Tom can go for hot dogs, have a few margaritas and
look at women in bikinis until your eyes fall out.
CAP’N GREG: That settles it. Next
stop is the Malecon to shop for ankle bracelets.
FIRST MATE: And then to Rodeo
Drive?
CAP’N GREG: As long as I can
wear my red T-shirt and captain hat, I’ll take you anywhere.
FIRST MATE:
Thanks, Cap’n Greg.
CAP’N GREG: Kissy kissy?
FIRST MATE: Don’t push it.
