I don’t know if readers celebrated a bit too much waaaay into January 2023, or were otherwise brain damaged, but February arrived with a lot of interesting questions. Please be patient. I will attempt to adequately answer them.
JENNIFER: Why are sunsets red and orange and yellow?
CAP’N GREG: Off-road vehicles on the Baja Peninsula kick up a lot of dust. The sun shining through all that airborne dirt causes the colorful sunsets.
MARIA: Why are sunrises red and orange and yellow?
CAP’N GREG: Asparagus farms in Caborca kick up a lot of dust. The sun shining through all that airborne dirt causes the colorful sunrises.
LEONARD: I wanna know. Have you ever seen the rain, coming down on a sunny day?
CAP’N GREG: Only in a Credence Clearwater song.
MARSHA: Do you know the way to San Jose?
CAP’N GREG: I suggest you Google it.
FRANK: I had eight of the best margaritas I ever had last night, but I can’t remember where.
CAP’N GREG: I’m surprised you can remember how many you had.
TOM: I always order tacos al pastor at Asadero Viva Mexico. Should I try something different?
CAP’N GREG: Absolutely not.
SUSAN: Should I be concerned that I crossed the border without my passport?
CAP’N GREG: No, but I’d be concerned how you’re gonna get back.
MIGUEL: I have this incredible crush on Emily Ratajkowski.
CAP’N GREG: Who doesn’t?
AMBER: What are churros made of?
CAP’N GREG: Sugar and spice and everything nice.
MEGAN: Will you meet me on Sandy Beach and go horseback riding?
CAP’N GREG: No and no.
OLIVIA: Is this bikini too small for me?
CAP’N GREG: What bikini?
LIAM: Do you get paid well to write this column?
CAP’N GREG: Yes. In fact, I have retired to my villa in the south of France, and only fly my Gulfstream G8 back to Peñasco on weekends.
SANDY: You look so familiar to me. Why is that?
CAP’N GREG: Maybe because we’ve been married 32 years.
SANDY: Is this a good place to end the column?
CAP’N GREG: As good a place as any.