Visitors to Puerto Peñasco often ask me how driving in Mexico differs from the States. Some wrongly assume the rules of the road are different and not enforced like where they live. Frank from Flagstaff doesn’t quite get it.
FRANK: I got picked up again, Cap’n Greg.
CAP’N GREG: Sorry to hear that. Speeding? Stop sign? Wearing a Cubs hat?
FRANK: Must have been speeding because the thing the cop pointed at me looked like a meat thermometer. Or maybe it was a hair dryer. I can’t be sure.
CAP’N GREG: Hand-held radar guns have been used in Sonoyta and Rocky Point for a very long time. How fast were you going?
FRANK: No idea, but the sign had a 20 on it. How fast is that?
CAP’N GREG: In kilometers? About 12 miles per hour.
FRANK: You’re kidding! The only way to make my truck go that slow is to put it up on blocks.
CAP’N GREG: If you can’t obey the law, maybe that’s where it belongs.
FRANK: Haha. You’re funny, Cap’n Greg. Anyway, I tried to pay off the cop, but he made me follow him to the police station. Added half an hour to my drive. That’s just not fair.
CAP’N GREG: Let me ask you, Frank. Have you ever tried to, as you say, pay off a cop in Flagstaff?
FRANK: Are you kidding? Bribery is a serious offense.
CAP’N GREG: It is in Mexico, too, with significant penalties.
FRANK: Oh, c’mon. How bad could it be?
CAP’N GREG: How about death by bunga-bunga?
FRANK: Yow! I never knew.
CAP’N GREG: So, are you going to watch your speed next time down?
FRANK: Absolutely, Cap’n Greg. As soon as I can figure out how to get my shotgun mounted in the back window.
CAP’N GREG: Do that, Frank, and speeding will be the least of your worries.
FRANK: Great. You want to meet me somewhere?
CAP’N GREG: That depends.
FRANK: Depends on what?
CAP’N GREG: Visiting hours at the jail.
FRANK: Haha. Wait. What?
