The high season is always fast-paced and interesting as an Airbnb host. Most of our renters are awesome. We love to host you at our condos and want you to have the best time and enjoy everything that our town has to offer. We love to give our recommendations and insights on yummy eats and fun activities. It’s always a great feeling when we can help someone have a memorable vacation and want to come back.

And yet, you sense that there may be a “however” in the above statement.

I am thinking I may need to update my Airbnb listing description with a few additional rules. The following should go without saying, but unfortunately all these things have actually happened, so maybe they need to be addressed…

Please do not use the common rooftop areas for sex parties, it really upsets the neighbors. It’s possibly also illegal, but I’m not sure of the public indecency laws in Mexico. Oh, and when you get caught by a neighbor, although it’s very generous of you to invite them to join, not everyone likes that kind of thing.

If you get your freak on inside the condo, fantastic, I’m happy you had a great time, but it is inconsiderate to leave things like your condom and underwear in the sheets, that’s why we have a trash can.

If you get into a screaming fight and it sounds like chairs and dishes are being thrown around, someone is going to report this to me. Additionally, if you break the front door lock in said fight and contact me claiming it just broke, when I send someone out to fix the lock, which we know was not broken before you got there, we are also going to find out about your two large unauthorized dogs in a no pets allowed condo.

If you break something, like say, the sliding glass door, please don’t try to pretend it was like that when you got there and tell me the broken glass is safety hazard, and then proceed to do complete 100-point home inspection pointing out every minor flaw in the condo. It’s just rude and I’m still going to charge you for breaking the glass.

Aside from these things, I do love my job hosting guests, and I hope you have an amazing vacation, and will accommodate anything within reason to make your stay enjoyable!

Love it or hate it, Airbnb is a significant part of traveling today. When I travel, I also use Airbnb as a guest because you truly get unique experiences. Some things to consider as a guest. You are not renting a room at a hotel. Your host is most likely a small business with one, two, or maybe a handful of properties. And like any small family-owned business, there are going to be unforeseen issues. Inevitably it seems the majority of issues occur between 10pm to 6am, (when I am asleep). One Airbnb I stayed at plainly stated: “We are a small family-run business, so we don’t have someone awake 24-hours. If you have an urgent need or issue between the hours of 10pm and 8am, please call. The alert from an Airbnb message or text may not be loud enough to wake one of us up. if it goes to voicemail, please immediately call again”.

And one final very important note. When it comes to writing reviews, please be as kind as possible. If there was some minor inconvenience, but your host made up for it, don’t leave a bad review. It’s better to not leave a review than leave a bad review; kind of like if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. As far as Airbnb is concerned, anything below 4-stars is a bad review and if you get a few 3-star reviews, they can pull your listing. My advice as a host is, if you feel you cannot leave a 4- or 5-star review, contact your host privately, and don’t leave a review. The only exception would be if you had a truly awful experience, like there was an actual safety issue, and want to warn others. Your host forgetting to leave a 25-cent shampoo and soap in the shower does NOT warrant a 3-star review. Yes, this actually happened and yes, I am still very salty about it! On the flip side, I will not leave you a bad review if you just got a little too rowdy on vacation. I consider it the cost of doing business, and none of the above guest escapades were reviewed to Airbnb.

They just give me great stories to tell…